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5 Secrets To Dealing With Disappointments

5 Secrets To Dealing With Disappointments

5 Secrets To Dealing With Disappointments

Disappointments can be debilitating especially when they are triggered by people closest to you or those you are counting on the most. If not dealt with properly, you may find yourself on a downward spiral that is hard to stop. You may move from one downturn to another and the end may be disastrous. If dealt with properly, disappointment can become a source of wisdom and transformation at a personal, professional and business level. Through disappointments, you also discover a lot about people which can be a gift in the long run.


There are 3 mistakes I see people make when dealing with disappointments

1. Blowing up

Some people just blow up which makes a bad situation worse because you cannot reason properly when you are heated up.

2. Blowing things out of proportion

Sometimes, a small disappointment is blown out of proportion. A mountain built out of a mole hill as the saying goes. This will disturb you further mentally and emotionally

3. Hiding

Hiding from a challenge or disappointment is almost always a big mistake because you cannot find a solution in hiding.


1. Take it as a lesson

Let me give you an example…  A sister was recently robbed of cash by a family member (from the husband’s side) who had come to spend the Easter weekend with them. After the whole episode, the husband was deeply disappointed and yet philosophical at the same time “It’s a lot of money but at least we now know who he (the robber) is. You never know, if we had kept him longer, one day he could have sold our child” Count the disappointment as school fees to learn about someone

2. Give feedback if you can

Amidst disappointment, some people just choose to keep quiet and boil quietly without speaking up. The challenge is that one day you will explode with all the pent-up anger and disappointments. It helps to go to the individual and talk to them about what you are not happy with and how the situation made you feel. This releases the heavy energy stored in you and also gives the other person feedback on how to improve next time. You will feel better in the process and the other party will be enlightened.

3. Find ways to avoid or minimize future disappointments

It also helps to pause and ask yourself a couple of questions… How did I get myself into this situation? How can I make sure that I don’t find myself in a similar situation next time? How can I minimize the possibility of this happening again? When you find or craft answers to the above questions and implement them accordingly, you will find yourself in a much better position next time.

4. Count what you have left

Amidst disappointments and frustrations, all is not lost. It helps to also count what you have left. For example, you still have life and that is a big start. When you count what you have left, it lessens the impact of the blow you have.

5. Seek divine guidance

God as your creator is your protector and comforter at the same time. As such, the same God knows the beginning and end of your life. The same God knows how you can navigate what you are going through at this particular time to have a successful conclusion to the current episode playing out in your life.

At the end of the day, remember that occasional disappointments are not the end of life but the beginning of something new and greater if you focus on the following…

• Taking the lessons from the experience
• Giving feedback to the person who has disappointed you
• Brainstorming on ways on how you can minimize future disappointments
• Counting what you have left (counting your blessings)
• Seeking divine guidance

Practising the above will not take the disappointment away but the tips will enable you to lessen the blow and make you stronger and wiser while moving forward next time.

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